tonight, E and i will go to sleep with the promise of 1,138 more legal rights than we woke up with this morning.
i remember what it felt like, the day i admitted to myself that yes, i was a lesbian. i remember the realization that i was, essentially, forfeiting a huge chunk of the rights and privileges that i had been born with. that, henceforth, i would be at the mercy of hospitals, landlords, employers, you name it. and for some of those things, the tightness in my chest remains.
many of us are still not protected from discrimination in housing or employment. there is still work to be done.
but, to be recognized as a full citizen again.....!
to be able to legally marry the woman i love....!
to be able to make medical decisions for each other, to be able to stay at each others' side no matter what the attitude of the conservative nurse or doctor. to file taxes together. to be on the same health insurance plan, PERIOD - no more hoping an employer offers same-sex partner benefits. to automatically be considered the legal heirs to each other, without the costly process of filling out and filing legal documents. to be recognized, BOTH OF US, as the legal parents of any children we may have or adopt.
and i only had to wait 15 years. some have waited their entire lives. and some never lived to see this day.
thank you, SCOTUS.
Friday, June 26, 2015
Thursday, June 25, 2015
goals
the financial aid fell through.
BUT.
i am nothing if not resilient, and have come up with an alternate plan. it will take me slightly longer to get through school, but hey, the time's going to pass anyway...and speaking of passing, the most pressing issue right now is quick-learning enough math to pass the assessment test and get into college algebra. (hell, i'll take intermediate algebra, too - the fewer classes i have to take, the better!)
my sinuses freaked out again, just in time for me to be pretty miserable the whole time K, J, and the kids were here last weekend. i think i'm allergic either to Windex, or to something in the heat/ac system of Mom's truck. those are the only two constants. anyway, today makes day 7, and i'm mostly feeling better! but i have to tell you about the awful night of coughing, two nights ago, that found me sitting on the kitchen floor with the cat, sipping whiskey out of a shot glass at 2am. fortunately, it worked! LOL!
the goals for this weekend:
Math
Light housecleaning
Math
Snuggling (etc)
Bake something
Cook something (healthy-ish, to balance whatever gets baked)
Math
Math
Math
Laundry
Math
Play with cat
and that's it! Happy Weekend!
BUT.
i am nothing if not resilient, and have come up with an alternate plan. it will take me slightly longer to get through school, but hey, the time's going to pass anyway...and speaking of passing, the most pressing issue right now is quick-learning enough math to pass the assessment test and get into college algebra. (hell, i'll take intermediate algebra, too - the fewer classes i have to take, the better!)
my sinuses freaked out again, just in time for me to be pretty miserable the whole time K, J, and the kids were here last weekend. i think i'm allergic either to Windex, or to something in the heat/ac system of Mom's truck. those are the only two constants. anyway, today makes day 7, and i'm mostly feeling better! but i have to tell you about the awful night of coughing, two nights ago, that found me sitting on the kitchen floor with the cat, sipping whiskey out of a shot glass at 2am. fortunately, it worked! LOL!
the goals for this weekend:
Math
Light housecleaning
Math
Snuggling (etc)
Bake something
Cook something (healthy-ish, to balance whatever gets baked)
Math
Math
Math
Laundry
Math
Play with cat
and that's it! Happy Weekend!
Wednesday, June 3, 2015
recap
whoa. six months, huh?
i guess some sum-uppage is in order:
i survived back-to-back December sinus infections while spending a large chunk of time being a reindeer (sometimes Rudolph, sometimes Doctor Reindeer, depending on the whims of Little V).
Oasis Hot Tub Gardens in Ann Arbor is very clean, reasonably priced, and super f*cking relaxing.
one of us turned 36, and the other turned 37.
E discovered the most amazing brownie recipe known to womonkind.
i made a special trip out to Portland. meet my new nephew, Little D:
E is on week three of her new job with Comcast (comm tech), and ALL THE CHANNELS ARE BELONG TO US! (mostly, this is exciting because of how much money we'll save, but also SO MANY SCIENCE AND HISTORY CHANNELS OMG!!!!)
this new job means that E will only get to go to MichFest for the weekend...if she gets to go at all.
this will be the 40th, and FINAL, Michigan Womyn's Music Festival. that's a whole separate blog post in and of itself, and there are still too many feels to sort through to write it now.
Portland wooed me hardcore with all the springtime glory it could muster. i bought some yarn that captured all the different colors, and made it into arm warmers:
Dallas and Houdini have been free-ranging together for the last several weeks! He is absolutely obsessed with the cat, and she is...pretty tolerant of him, actually, considering that he has no boundaries and interprets her warning meows and swats as "YAAAAYYY WE'RE PLAYING". but hey, she's not a basement-dwelling kitty anymore, and we're all a lot happier for it.
i'm partway through a new blanket:
we're in the thick of wedding planning, and anxiously waiting for the Supreme Court to let us know if we'll be doing that here or in a different state (or country - Canada's only 20 minutes away). we're also on the fence about what we'd like to do. get legalled ASAP with a justice-of-the-peace ceremony downtown with ten guests, then go out for barbecue? or wait, and have a big shindig in my mom's back yard (also involving barbecue)? or get legalled now, and have the big party later? AAAAUGGGHHH.
at least we found the perfect cake toppers:
so that's done.
the timing is further complicated by my returning to school this fall. i'm finally taking the plunge and aiming for a BSN!!!!! I KNOW!!!! but there's the whole financial aid thing to consider. the upcoming school year is already covered (yay Pell grants!), but if we get legally married in the state of Michigan this year, i won't qualify for as much aid next year (or the two years after that). so...yeah. we're torn between doing it as soon as legally possible, and there really being no rush at all. Comcast offers same-sex partner benefits, so we'll be ok on that front if we choose to wait. but...MARRIED! but...financial aid! but...it's 2015 and we could keep track of anniversaries so easily! but...not enough time or money to get all our friends and loved ones together the way we'd really like to do. but...we were so looking forward to our first Fest as a married couple...but, new job/bad timing...
mostly, we're breathing and reminding ourselves that the marriage is what matters most - and we have a great one, officially recognized or not. the rest is just details (and an excuse to eat cake and lots of barbecue.)
i guess some sum-uppage is in order:
i survived back-to-back December sinus infections while spending a large chunk of time being a reindeer (sometimes Rudolph, sometimes Doctor Reindeer, depending on the whims of Little V).
Oasis Hot Tub Gardens in Ann Arbor is very clean, reasonably priced, and super f*cking relaxing.
one of us turned 36, and the other turned 37.
E discovered the most amazing brownie recipe known to womonkind.
i made a special trip out to Portland. meet my new nephew, Little D:
E is on week three of her new job with Comcast (comm tech), and ALL THE CHANNELS ARE BELONG TO US! (mostly, this is exciting because of how much money we'll save, but also SO MANY SCIENCE AND HISTORY CHANNELS OMG!!!!)
this new job means that E will only get to go to MichFest for the weekend...if she gets to go at all.
this will be the 40th, and FINAL, Michigan Womyn's Music Festival. that's a whole separate blog post in and of itself, and there are still too many feels to sort through to write it now.
Portland wooed me hardcore with all the springtime glory it could muster. i bought some yarn that captured all the different colors, and made it into arm warmers:
Dallas and Houdini have been free-ranging together for the last several weeks! He is absolutely obsessed with the cat, and she is...pretty tolerant of him, actually, considering that he has no boundaries and interprets her warning meows and swats as "YAAAAYYY WE'RE PLAYING". but hey, she's not a basement-dwelling kitty anymore, and we're all a lot happier for it.
i'm partway through a new blanket:
we're in the thick of wedding planning, and anxiously waiting for the Supreme Court to let us know if we'll be doing that here or in a different state (or country - Canada's only 20 minutes away). we're also on the fence about what we'd like to do. get legalled ASAP with a justice-of-the-peace ceremony downtown with ten guests, then go out for barbecue? or wait, and have a big shindig in my mom's back yard (also involving barbecue)? or get legalled now, and have the big party later? AAAAUGGGHHH.
at least we found the perfect cake toppers:
so that's done.
the timing is further complicated by my returning to school this fall. i'm finally taking the plunge and aiming for a BSN!!!!! I KNOW!!!! but there's the whole financial aid thing to consider. the upcoming school year is already covered (yay Pell grants!), but if we get legally married in the state of Michigan this year, i won't qualify for as much aid next year (or the two years after that). so...yeah. we're torn between doing it as soon as legally possible, and there really being no rush at all. Comcast offers same-sex partner benefits, so we'll be ok on that front if we choose to wait. but...MARRIED! but...financial aid! but...it's 2015 and we could keep track of anniversaries so easily! but...not enough time or money to get all our friends and loved ones together the way we'd really like to do. but...we were so looking forward to our first Fest as a married couple...but, new job/bad timing...
mostly, we're breathing and reminding ourselves that the marriage is what matters most - and we have a great one, officially recognized or not. the rest is just details (and an excuse to eat cake and lots of barbecue.)
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